Children aren't the only ones who need a time-out once in a while. Parents need them too.
One of the dumb parenting mistakes I made was losing my cool. Especially when I was tired, stressed, or torn between what I should do when both kids needed me at the same time. I realized that before I could solve this problems I had to get in touch with my own feelings. Many years later I devised a slogan for new parents, "BEFORE YOU EXPLODE OR DROP, STOP!" In order for you to use this advice wisely you must figure out how you feel JUST BEFORE you start screaming at your kids.
Don't think you're the only parent in the world who gets angry at your kids. We all do. But we learn to stay in control, not only to spare our children the anguish of having an angry parent who yells at them but also because screaming and acting angry simply doesn't work.
The trick to staying in control is to recognize when your normal emotional feelings are about to boil over. That's the time for your Parental Time-out. Simple to do. Just leave the room after ensuring that your kids are safe. Put a baby in the crib or playpen, tell an older child you need a Parental Time-out and JUST LEAVE.
Yes, the kids may cry but that's a whole lot better than seeing you explode. Kids are terrified by out-of-control parents.
Take a few deep breaths, walk around the room whatever works for you. When you've calmed down, resume your parenting.
Marilyn Heins, MD
This answer is NOT intended as a substitute for professional medical care. ALWAYS consult your physician or childcare expert if you have any questions concerning yourself or your family's well being.
No comments:
Post a Comment